#okay i'm motivated now

[orsanedraws]

Hello! So I am, months later, still in love with your drawing of John Pruitt based on the song The Noose. I was wondering if you had it available as a print? I would love to buy it.

Hello hello! I'm so delighted to hear that <3 I'm not selling any prints atm BUT i've been meaning to set a print shop for quite some time, so if I do eventually I will write about it!

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

posting this with absolutely no context

[johnslittlespoon]

Tough And Sweet (Like You And Me) ♡

'Gale looks unfairly handsome in the soft golden light of the late evening, but even more unfair is the fact that John can’t just bridge the gap between them and kiss his feelings away. The more time he spends around Gale, the more it feels like he’s being consumed by his overwhelming infatuation, and there’s not a single thing he can do about it that doesn’t involve the risk of scaring the man out of his life.

So he shuts the truck door behind him after promising Gale he’ll text when he’s safe inside, and he tries not to stare too forlornly as the truck putters off down the street and rounds the corner.'

[ AO3 ]

[zylphiacrowley]

Code Blood pt.2

<previous - next>

[icewindandboringhorror]

Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~

(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)

[lacecap]

song about something you'll never be forgiven for. beepbox link here, and a singalong under the read more :''-)

starting point "…so don't look back" i took your hand and led you astray into the light i fear i might have made a fatal mistake walk in a straight line walk in a straight line i couldn't ask i only hope that sinners are saved but in all honesty, my honor keeps me somewhat afraid walk in a straight line don't dare look behind ♫♫♫ i had a dream we tried to reach the finishing line but in the silence still the time we killed had come back to life walk in a straight line walk in a straight line the signs had merged into a single "end of the world" where every undead thing was damned to sing "esrever ni gnos a" walk in a straight line …tell me that you're fine ♫♫♫ walk in a straight line (walk in a straight line) don't dare look behind (don't dare look behind) tell me that you're fine (something that had died) you're still breathing right? (are you satisfied?) walk between the lines (how to save a life) don't dare look behind (change the ending line) reach the end this time (tell a little lie) bring me back to life… ♫♫♫ if i'd look back and held the hands that led me astray into the light i'd proudly cry "this is my final mistake" walk with me this time walk with me this time i should have asked i know the answer's somewhat cliché but was it worth the price and worth the pain? you're fading away— walk with me this time bring me back to life… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if you'd look--

[daemon-in-my-head]

Bout that essay titled 'A study of Gortash's twisted love of humanity'- yk what fuck it here goes nothing. Back into a facists megalomaniacs mind we go. Spoiler; this is long.

But first of all; let's do a thought experiment. Let's just assume, for shits and giggles, Gortash's position would've somehow been swapped with any other the other chosen or another Banite:

Let's start with the Banites: if we had gotten anyone except for Gortash Baldur's Gate would've been fucked. Like genuinely. Banites are cruel, vicious, unashamedly gaudy (they suck ass at infiltration missions) and they exploit loopholes perhaps even better than fiends. Any other Banite would've simply reveled in the fear caused by rampant myrkulites and bhaalists and probably stoked that fire by employing some of their own forces. And depending on whether the Zhents join the winning side or not they would've probably used and abused the black network to absolutely dominate trade and potentially choke out every non desirable in the city itself by fun activities such as grand scale slavery, starving an entire city, or simply employing enough mercenaries and some Bhaalist to get the job done. Banites fuck everyone over so hard they usually don't even stop at themselves, and prideful cruel beings who know absolutely no bounds in their desire for power commonly don't hesitate, especially not Banites who thrive in backstabbing. So the other chosen and the grand design are fucked cuz they will most certainly get removed for the sake of someone more desirable the second they somehow irk Banes favourite toy. Which in some specific cases (all of them) would be in 5 minutes flat. If you thought the local nobility was bad just wait until you see a Banite in their natural environment.

Ketheric: Yeah Baldur's Gate is fucked. Ketheric cares about one thing and one thing only; Isobel. And he employs a bunch of sadistic necromancers who have no concept of personal boundaries or consent for that matter, so chances are he'd let them roam freely in Baldur's Gate, making the streets a huting ground for his followers to find prime subjects to perform inhumane experiments on all while he turns a blind eye; either busy trying to get Isobel under his (mind-) control, reviving her or treating a brainless puppet that looks and once was his daughter like his one true solution to decades of grief and fucking up. He wouldn't care about what happens to the city, to the other chosen or even the grand design. He'd follow his gods orders but thats about it and no matter whether that's still Myrkul or Bane; everyone's fucked cuz surpringly the guy who adores lichdom more than life and the other guy who'd rather 'burn everyone's fields than loose' aren't about to give out any orders that will benefit anyone but themselves.

Orin: Another great case of 'yeah Baldur's Gate is fucked'. Orin wants one thing and one thing only: recognition. Preferably from Bhaal but she'd take anyone at this point. The problem about this whole thing is, she's been conditioned and instilled with so much self-loathing my dearest murder princess can't even begin to realise when she's getting shown any sort of adoration anymore and immediately understands it as mockery, see, for example, her butler. Is what I would say if their corpse wasn't chilling in Durges old bedroom. All Orin would do is stage ever grander and more elaborate public massacres and involuntary 'anatomy displays'. Baldur's Gate wouldn't simply be fucked; give her a week, and the majority of it would be dead. This works well for Bhaal, but for anyone else, it would kinda suck. Including the other two of the dead three. And the cult would probably still loathe her simply due to her not being a true Bhaalspawn, so cue Orin's madness reaching an absolute boiling point. She doesn't and would never care for any of the other chosen or the grand design. Unless she's reigned in, she's a utterly loose canon, even more so than she was already, with Gortash or Durge at the helm, respectively.

Now time for my favourite of the reckless murder hobos; Durge. Given the few in game notes we have Durge had a thing for obliteration. Including but not limited to every living being + themselves. So let's just assume Gortash’s cocky upstart charm and Orins assassination attempt didn't work out as planned and they are still the de facto leader but now without any leash. Baldur's Gate is probably obliterated. Alongside whatever else remains of the sword coast. Or Troil. They'd probably also have some weird ass fuck relationship with the brain cuz they already did without being the undisputed leader. And the brain would probably discard the grand design themselves cuz somehow Durge has that effect on things (might be the innate charm magic of Bhaalist priests that they use to convince people to join a literal murder cult). Either way, with Durge not giving a single damn about the other chosen, any plans but Bhaals (or their misunderstood version of it) and a dramatic love for self-obliteration, it may finally be time to remedy the elves' mistake and rip Abeir-Toril apart properly. Ao hates this trick, alongside everyone else, probably including Bhaal himself.

Which is all my longwinded way of saying; Gortash is the lesser evil. In any set of circumstances he displays enough leniency, monster fucker vibes and rationality to somehow keep this ruined, sinking ship from hitting the sea floor immediately. He has enough of a twisted love for humanity left, compared to the others, to a degree that he doesn't blindly follow orders or actively seeks the destruction of everything, let alone 'true' domination the way Bane intends to have it.

But yes, indeed, Gortash performed fucked up and cruel experiments. No doubt about that. And yet it was still on a lesser scale than a mad massive hoard of necromancers could, and his experiments, for the most part, actually yielded results, didn't they? Presumably, the Coginator and the remote control brain mechanism used for the Steelwatch. After all, there are zombies(?) in there, controlling that shit. However, the experiments on loving families were probably one of his selfish indulgences and his sorry attempt at figuring out if he was just born loathsome and his family sucks ass or if that's normal and humanity doesn't deserve a second chance. Or a 30th. FR lore is fucked up.

This is also a great transition to exhibit B of my thesis why Gortash does in fact love or is at the very very very least heavily intrigued by humanity; the sole existence of the Steelwatch. Listen, my guy serves Bane. Bane hates planning. He likes immediate results. So much so he actively pisses off his situationship Bhaal for it. Repeatedly. And he likes fear and tyranny. So what do you think the chances are that the black hand would actually enjoy the thought of a mecha army patrolling the streets of Baldur's Gate, keeping them save, and worst of all, instilling hope in the hearts of the populous, peasants and nobles alike? Yeah, absolutely fucking none. And yet Gortash did that. And he's not even just a regular banite. He's Banes chosen. He carries a part of Bane's divinity within himself. He has the de facto highest position in the local faith. He's Banes favourite toy rn. He's the centre of attention and he still goes out of his way to use things that could 1000% inspire fear and hatred to sow fucking hope and a sense of safety of all things in plain sight? I bet his adorable wrinkly ass that Bane wasn't happy and that even a thousand rituals to redeem his leniency won't save him from getting tortured extra hard for this fuck up. And considering the state of the Banites scriptures we found, and his entire character, Gortash is smart enough to know this is something Bane absolutely loathes. And yet my guy did that.

Another thing is the hive mind. Bane would probably not hate it outright, as its still 'burning the fields' by turning souls illithid, but it's wasted potential. Because there's so many great things you can do with a hivemind and the remote control over people's thoughts and emotions, for example instilling fear and terror the very things Bane loves. But that's, once again, not Gortash plan. If the notes and one of the evil endings is anything to go by the hivemind doesn't trap people in a state of torment, it does the polar opposite. People are happy, enjoying a better, simpler and nicer life. Enjoying an idea of what their life could've been like. They're smiling, happy, enjoying a casual market stroll and the bountiful rewards of the fields. Which is all things that a good Banite should hate and never inflict on someone. AND YET that's presumably Gortashs plan. Create a hivemind where everyone can dream happily and do soulless labour without noticing it while the world goes to absolute shit but the people do not. It's basically noah's arc. It's paradise in hell. The people are 'saved' while the gods continue to fight their petty games, and Gortash alone lords over this perfect dream. Protecting it answer using it to advance further.

Now, about the busts found in his office. Most of them depicted rather unsavoury, cruel people. Except for one. Which honours a self made person who took pity on those who had less. On those considered lesser by the upright and honourable citizens of the Gate. It's weird how, between all those symbols and testaments to cutlery and tyranny, there's still a sliver of empathy, renegade justice and even care for fellow humans imbued, isn't it? And what's even weirder, all of them are found in Gortash's most private place? His own little office hidden far above the grandeur of the throne room and the Fortress, where he sits at the helm, lording over his subjects and scheming his little plans? This is an excellent example of show, don't tell btw. It's hitting you over the head with the implications. But just in case, this might very well be a reflection of Gortashs mind itself and the visible expression of him being incapable of letting go of humanity as a whole, still carrying it somewhere not even that well buried between the resentment and cruelty but out in plain view for everyone curious enough to touch it because what others reason would he have tob'play the benelovent ruler' in a place where no one sees it? Where only his most trusted and fellow Banites mingle?

And, ofc, as I am a durgetash truther, another exhibit. Him fucking Bhaals gore baby and putting a leash on it prematurely. You see, I've already talked about Banes likes and dislikes plenty so it should come as no surprise that the Edgelord Surpreme wouldn't hate carnage wrought upon foolish mortals by idiots who follow lesser gods than himself, since it would still somehow contribute to people being scared and panicking. But Gortash, being the ever faithful fuck up of a Banite, reigns in the Bhaalist and even the Myrkulites enough for that to kinda never really happen. He stopped the carnage from happening altogether, in fact, by giving the others enough scraps to keep them satisfied and from acting out but not enough freedom to fuck up his plans. I mean, heck he was apparently so convincing he managed to get Durge, again, biggest fan of self-obliteration, from going on an apocalyptic rampage cuz 'daddy I like his brain and I don't mean for dinner'. Him doing that actively contributed to preventing another Bhaalspawn crisis, which could've very well happened with Bhaals resurgence and revival, 2.5 loose canons and no ward of a random old guy in sight. But also him providing a clear goal and orders for Ketheric kept the lich from giving in to the sweet release of just not caring at all whatsoever. Everyone had their designated roles and boundaries and that was perhaps the only thing keeping this group of mentally unstable creatures from unleashing an apocalyptic nightmare; which again would've worked in their gods favour and technically didn't need any prevention.

And about the Gondians... Yeah this is gonna sound fucked up, cuz it is, but Gortash is actually treating them exceptionally nice. Their families are actually still alive and its not just a lie he's telling them, we don't actually see anyone getting flayed, strung up or tortured in some other way outright, they actually get to wear clothes and presumably they're fed enough to a degree that most of them can still somewhat work and the collar and the threat of your head exploding does suck but he could've also simply chained them to their work stations but they aren't. Let alone use charms or other beguiling and fucked up magic to force them into complacency. And they're not being resold or redistributed or forced to serve some random ass guy. The Gondians are, from a Forgotten Realms and probably Bane's perspective, treated exceptionally well. As are their families. Still undoubtedly fucked up and kinda sadistic with the whole explosion collar but objectively speaking he's one of the nicer slave masters. And they do allow him to produce the Steel Watchers en mass which once again contributes to the overall safety of Baldurs Gate and its other citizens. Still the lesser evil.

Though to be fair; Gortash also did some things Bane would really celebrate. Like somehow cheating his way into obtaining the Iron Throne, fucking Bhaals favourite and most fucked up """"child"""" and of course, keeping his parents alive and in agony to eternally fuel Banes fear kink. Except, it's only Sally who's afraid. Dravo is basically a blue screen of death personified at this point. He's a hollow, numb husk, isn't he? So somehow this once again doesn't align with Banes goals and Gortash's duty as a Banite. He's fucked it up again. But Gortash could've also simply killed them if all he wanted was revenge. Why go out of your ways, program elaborate scripts into them, keep the very place that testaments his fucked up past in good condition? Because a quick death would be too merciful? But then why is he so quick to turn on Durge if they betray him in a much smaller scale than his parents did. Well, perhaps he chose not to simply kill the very people who prepared Belladonna in the kitchen when he came to visit because he himself still needs them. Because underneath all that rage and spite there's still a broken boy who wants to hear his parents, albeit empty praise, and who wants to prove to them that he can be better? That his useless playing around actually helped better humanity, that he himself helped countess people and made lives better when all they thought he'd be useful as would be a pawn?

So, is it twisted? Yes. Is it rotten? Absolutely. Is it anything you'd consider to be 'conventional'? Absolutely not. But he does hold some wildly fucked up 'love' for humanity, if only as means to a grander goal (that being himself, ofc) or perhaps cuz he's genuinely incapable of letting go. Whether it's that, to spite Raphael, Bane and his parents or someone else, who knows. Probably nobody. But the shit he does is unorthodox and oddly self-sacrificial in a way where I just can't go, 'yeah no he absolutely loathes the sheer existence of the concept'.

I still think it's a missed opportunity he's not trying to build a spelljamming port though. I feel like he would absolutely do that somewhere down the line, if only to limit the black networks influence.

[crabsnpersimmons]

Miss, it's time to go to bed. Are you on your phone again? Sleeping late will ruin your lovely skin. This is the final warning. If you don't fall asleep now, We are going to dance. - "잘자요 아가씨" by ASMRZ

found this song and i was possessed to draw @starriegalaxy's butler Eclipse dancing to it

(also i apologize in advance for my horrendous hiragana, hangul, and cursive)

Textless, effectless version under the cut!

[stupid-elf]

Growing up with strict, neurodivergent parents while neurodivergent yourself will have you as an adult acting like you've recently escaped the feywild. What are the tricky rules? Is everything accounted for? How do I ensure I don't accidentally step over the line into Impoliteness. You know the consequences aren't death and dismemberment but you might look down one day and find you've lost your shadow and all of your friends if you're not careful

[somegrumpynerd]

They're so lovely, your Honour. Dadmare is king, his boys forever goofy. I refuse to stop complimenting your art-

The one where Nightmare, he HIGHLIGHTED concerning lyrics that he PRINTED OUT to show CROSS. It's so wholesome- he's such a dad and I love it. I love your art, it's so sweet. I love it.

Asdbkjbfjk STOP I'M GOING TO DIE hello 911 somebody's being nice to me on the internet help

Thank you!! <3 You are FAR too kind, I am sending 1 million good vibes directly to your home as revenge >:3c

He just worries! He wants his sons- I mean boys- I MEAN UNDERLINGS to be happy and when he hears one of them absolutely wailing about feeling numb and disappointed he wants to check in. Also he finally learned to use the printer without help and he's taking advantage of it.

It's also important to note this is all Pigeon's fault for having such amazing cool ideas and going feral with me about them, which is how we get things like this

Smooth.

[teacolouredink]

Hey long time no post! :D It's been a hot minute for sure lol but I'm back in full swing this weekend for grand festival 🩷💚 I decided to take on the ever so ambitious (for me lol) project of drawing all the idols over the next few days omg.. Am I ever gonna get to playing turf wars?? ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡ anw the squid sisters are up first YAYY!! And hopefully Pearl and Marina tomorrow, fingers crossed I can keep this going!!

[bread-is-my-life]

I'm an advocate for Stainmight. I love them so much and have been trying to convince others just how much sense they make as a ship. Stain would absolutely do anything for Toshi. He'd reform himself and become the best version of himself if Toshi asked it of him.

They deserve the world 🥹😭

HI HI NICE TO MEET YA!!! :3 You are so real for that... Also HE ABSOLUTELY WOULD!!!

Also let me give you those weird school doodles of em :3 ignore how their height makes no sense in every pic and other mistakes lol I did those instead of studying ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ I PROMISE THAT I WILL COOK SMTH SOON!!!

(btw on the second pic Toshi forgot his scarf and Stain forced him to wear his but then they just decided to share it :D I might redraw it later and fix all the mistakes like Toshi's height LMAO)

ANYWAYS I LOVE ALL STAINMIGHT SHIPPERS GUYS PLEASE I WANT TO HUG YOU ALL AND SHAKE YOUR HANDS AND AND *explodes*

[essektheylyss]

I realized that A Crown of Candy is actually the first time I've watched Zac Oyama play D&D, and it's frankly been wild watching how masterfully and quickly he sets up Lapin and the depths of this rabbit. I know it's been said that Zac's an excellent player, but it's one thing to hear and another to actually witness.

I feel like it probably shouldn't surprise anyone that the liar spellcaster with the religious bullshit is my favorite right off the bat, but it's funny because the first introduction of him did not endear me to him whatsoever, and in fact kind of off-put me, but every further piece of information about him, and in fact many of his offhand comments, feels like picking up a log on the ground and finding an entire microbiome underneath.

[alwayshappyhoursomewhere]

"Together with Stéphane" [x] [image description in the article: Shoma Uno holds a piece of paper with his hopes for the second half of the season, which says "together with Stéphane", in Beijing, China, on December 10, 2023.]

―This season you are focusing on expression, but do you actually feel like there is a dilemma between the skating that you want to do and the current rules? ◆Until last year, yes. I didn't like that what is considered as a good performance is 'jumping'. [...] But it's what we do within the rules. We have to be able to adapt to any rule. So I also want to practice according to the current rules. Until last year, my opinion clashed with Stéphane's on this aspect. I only wanted results, while Stéphane wanted me to work hard on expression as well. But expression doesn't really bring points. Until last year I was thinking, 'No, no, I have to focus on jumps'. Now I agree with Stéphane. I don't know if it's because I'm in a state of mind where I'm satisfied with my results, but now I'm going in the same direction as Stéphane, so I want to do the things he wishes for."

―After your performance, you turn to coach Lambiel right away. Is that because you want to see his reaction first? ◆First of all, yes. This time, after the short program was over, he looked really delighted. He was really pleased after this free skate too, and I was really happy about that. There's a part of me that feels like I'm working hard for that. I guess that that kind of moments are what make me happy.

―Your fellow teammate Koshiro Shimada also said, "The goal of Shoma and I is to make Stéphane scream in excitement as much as possible.'' ◆Certainly (laughs). That's for sure.

―Does it motivate you to perform in a way that makes people around you happy? ◆Of course that's one of my motivations. However, making Stéphane happy is more like a "goal" than a motivation.

―You wrote "together with Stephane" on the cardboard. ◆This is my current state of mind. My heart, mind, and motivation are overflowing, and although this grand prix series made Stéphane really happy, I can still make him even happier. From now on, I want to do my best and work hard towards the next events together with Stéphane, and show the results in competition.

(Note: this was translated by me, but a much longer full translation has been shared here and here with more content than what I posted on tumblr)

[sunsestart]

I'm so obsessed with this song rn

It's addictive 😞😞

And,,, CALL ME CRAZY, BUT UHH it kinda reminds me of deltarune a little (Especifically with Caine as deltarune's Gaster)

Okay I'll continue yapping undert the cut,,

I mean- we still can't be fully sure of what his role is gonna be

But it's VERY likely he's responsible for the darkworlds, and we know those heavily represent escapism—life is better down there! there's adventure, there's fun, food, friends, you can overcome challenges, your dreams can come true

But at the end of the day they're not real...

One of my favorite theories is that Gaster is using those dark worlds to analyze our behavior, he's purposely making connections to undertale to grab our attention

Undertale's world is designed to be a game, deltarune's world isn't BUT THE DARKWORLDS ARE

OKAY SO HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO THE SONG?????

Uhh, spoilers for digital circus!!

All the characters are forcefully placed in this "amazing digital world" where anything is virtually possible! Caine is constantly sending them on adventures, he's not real, but his purpose is to entertain the real humans in the circus... reminds you of something?? THE DARKNERS! THEIR WHOLE PURPOSE IS TO ENTERTAIN LIGHTNERS! BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY... TO ENTERTAIN YOU!! THE PLAYER!!

Okay so... actually going over the parts of the song that remind me of all of this and explaining aoahsk

It's mostly just the Caine parts that really remind me of Gaster making fun worlds for the player "If you love adventure, you're in luck!

Instead of the lightners hating this fake reality, they love it! And it's not like it's forever... they always have the choice to leave...

(Not like the digital circus cast that has no other option but to stay and no memories of their previous lives...)

But who knows! That might change! The weird route might change the perspective of the characters?? It's gonna be so harsh for Susie to realize she can't be with Ralsei and Lancer at the festival...she seemed so excited about the idea...😭

OKAY SO LAST PART, WHERE CAINE GETS A LITTLE CRAZY

That could fit in a situation where maybe something bad comes out of the dark worlds...and the character become more wary of them...

He might try to convince us of how bad and awful reality is compared to his dark worlds

Or something....

ANYWAYS YEAH THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN THINKING LATELY

[heroshifter]

So, I just saw my love life falling apart.

Is there any better motivation to shift !?